I asked for a sign, he had given me. Indirectly but too obvious. It's been A day, A day. And I can't get it off my mind. I thought I could forget it by sleeping, but, amf! I slept and woke up having the same damn thing. What to do? I'm clueless.
So yeah, I asked for a sign, I guess he gave me one. I feel like I'm running away from who I am now. It's like, I'm trying to hide and make excuses just to go back to the old me. I don't get it, not at all. Even though I know I ran out of chance, why do I keep going on and expecting to even have one. Is there a reason why? If there is, what could it be? Would it be because he might give me another chance? Or maybe because he is ready to accept me again? Or, maybe because I'm stupid and God just made this up so I could wake up from the dream I'm still believing and dreaming of.
I don't know. But I'd like to know, because I'm curious. I just wanted to prove myself that I have something worth believing for. I just wanted to hear you say you love me too even for one last time. You don't know how much I wanted to tell you that I still care. That I'm still here waiting, that I will always be here. That I still love you, but everyday I see you, I just can't do it.
You're my strength when I'm weak. You're my voice when I can't speak. You're my eyes when I can't see. You're my friend when I need to be me. And I don't want you to be my tears when I want to cry because I should not have a reason to cry.
I love you. I never loved anyone like this before. I never cried this much for a guy. I never felt this way before. The love, the pain, the endurance, the sorrow, the emptiness. I don't know what to do. You left me with nothing. Nothing but fear to love again. Why can't you just come back, even for a day, just to pull me up once again?
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