i love you still

ever dearest you,

it's been a week. and i still make myself believe that you'll come back even though now i know that you won't and it'll never happen. i guess i really have to move on now. i can't believe YOU, it's you who can make me give up. if ever you plan to come back around somewhere in the future, don't dare to show up when i'm almost over you ok?

the other day, you apologized for all the stress you've put me in. i'm still me. i can easily fall in. so i forgive you. i forgive you for leaving me, for destroying me. but somehow, i thank you, cause you taught me how to get back up. but in a very hard way. wow. i can't imagine, been suffering in this pain for 5 days... how come i feel it's still not enough?

how come everything became so serious back then? and only now i realized, we shouldn't have done it seriously. don't worry, i'll always write a letter to you, here, on blog. so just visit yea?

hehe =)

i thought this fairytale will come true. all i ever wanted was to hold you close to me. embrace your heart. and spend my time with you. but i guess, you came to me as a gift. a gift that won't last long. not long enough for me to handle. but in my eyes, you're the best present i've received. and i did not took you for granted, i did not ask for any exchange. so i'm thanking you again, for making me happy, at least for a month.

thank you for being with me, standing by my side and being the light of my life. for the last time, i wanna say i love you, and i always have. i don't know whether i could still feel this in the future. (lol) remember? when we're still friends, when we still don't have an idea that i'd like you and you'd do. i could remember the day i told you i have feelings for you... you were watching transformers in the cinema. and i sent you a message because i realized i like you. =)

then you replied and told me you were in the cinema and then you said: you know, get that weird feeling too. i think i like you too... =) <~ i memorized that... cause` it's memorable.. xP

i can still remember texting you the whole day and never get tired of it. it's been a long time for me to keep that feelings for you jun, it's been 2 years since that day i told you. i couldn't believe i still do until now, so no doubt i'd still feel the same thing for you in the future.

well who knows, but i believe that so. i don't think you'll feel the same thing. but let me be honest, you're the best thing that has ever happened to me. =) and another thing to be honest about is, i can't pretend to be strong anymore. so if you don't like me anymore, please let me like you. if thats the only way for me to feel at least a lil` better.

friends? like before? i miss it... =(

hope i'll get a reply...

loves,

chels =)